Thursday, 28 January 2010

'Boys' Feedback

So today I got the audience feedback on the rehearsed reading of my play, 'Boys'. Most of it was pretty good. For your delectation, I've included it here:

Sum up what the play means to you in four words

Fun, tragedy.
Rude, crude, disgusting, funny.
Comedic, funny, camp.
Drama, banter, bravery, willies.
Honesty and friendship prevail.
It was funny.
Hashy, crazy, silly, surreal.
Funny, hilarious, cheeky, fun.
Landlord follows Elvis example (nb without the burger).
Drama, fun, over the top.
The world is depraved.
Mad, unpleasant, grotesque, chaotic.
Didn’t get it, not my thing.
Troubled, niche market, offensive, lewd. [That could also describe me . . . ;)]
Didn’t understand.
Gay all the way.
Good, funny.
Complication, cliché, frenetic.
Gays, drugs and life.
Interesting, bold, funny.
‘Withnail in Pink’. [My favourite!]
Hilarious, light.
Comedy, farce.
Lazy plot, cheap jokes.
Pace, honour.
Friendship, love, responsibility, boys.
Provocative, sex, difference, wit.
Lots of knob gags.
Queer as folk!
Contrived queen comedy chaos.
Funny, disgusting.
Different, humorous.
Free, fearless, pride, selfish. [Another description of me, maybe?]
Rising camp. [Another favourite comment.]
Over the top sarcasm.
Pacy, funny, superficial, hedonistic.
Funny, camp, well written.
I’ll be truthful, I missed the main point of this piece.
Gays, money, love, life.
Real life for gay men.
That was ok.
Not bad.
Stereotypes, drama, ridicule.
Funny, raw.
Funny, original, one-liners.
One-liners stitched together.


What image/moment affected you the most in this play and why?

When the masks came off at the end. [Good.]
The image of going down to the flat.
Sort the rent out moment. [A popular one, apparently :P]
When I came over to ‘sort the rent out’.
The line ‘drugs are character building’. [One of my favourite lines, too.]
The fast paced energy that plays of a farcical nature need.
The doll!
Narrator paints the scene, ‘Fuck a (or the) Taliban’, ‘Joan of arse’, ‘Drugs are character building’.
‘Fucking the Taliban’.
Too much description. [It was a rehearsed reading; the scene wasn't acted and a narrator read the stage directions. Hence why there was 'too much' description.]
School boy humour.
Sucking wood.
Drag factor/banana.
This play was probably the best of the lot. [*blushes*]
Great visual comedy.
The blow-up doll.
When Luke is outside the window.
Not sure what the doll was about.
Stereotypes negatively. [Yawn.]
The speed of the script.
The jokes were trite and predictable.
Blow-up doll.
Asda 20p joke, hilarious. [It was about prostitution and those cheap 20p rides outside Asda . . .]
The actors acted gay well.
How realistic it was.
Everyone to their own.
The moments leading up to the discovery of the landlord. [The producer actually asked me to cut this section down.]
Some funny one-liners.
Troy leaving.


Do you have any further comments you would like to make about this play?

Too stereotypical, like Joe Orton, seen it all before despite some good lines.
Be better on TV, would have preferred more serious material sooner.
Brilliantly paced.
The aim was fine but the comedy wasn’t realised, over-complicated as a farce, a bold effort but gloriously under-developed, not sure this can be salvaged.
Very, very funny script.
Very funny, maybe a tiny bit too funny.
Very funny, may need more story.
Nice, it didn’t rely on swearing to get through it.
Would make a good sitcom. [My hopes for the script, too . . .]
Good to hear directions from narrator, well constructed, one of the best tonight, good scene changes, US beckons. [*blushes*]
Very original and funny, some great lines.
Didn’t enjoy this play at all.
Funny though.
Not appealing to the masses, not marketable, this can’t be rammed down our throats.
Not too bad.
It was fun.
Funny, enjoyed.
Nice structure with narrator delivery, almost too quick to catch anything. [The reading was very quick; there weren't really gaps left for the audience to laugh as in a normal sitcom.]
Some great one-liners.
Dialogue was good, good pace, some stereotypes, though overall quite funny and some witty moments.
Plot was lost in favour of jokes, there is a limit to the number of sexual puns that I can find funny in 20 minutes.
Please take this all the way, people will love it. [Oh, we did go all the way ;)]
Think it went over my head.
The humour was contrived, but may be that’s just because I don’t tend to do ‘comedy theatre’.
Felt like it wanted to be a film/TV script, rather than made for the stage, collapsed under the weight of too many jokes, some of which were generously funny but suffocated any coherent or original script.
They could have shown a better image of [This was left unfinished.]
Did a good job of exploring gay issues in a liberating way.
I’m way too old to understand half the references.
Very entertaining, liked the style of narrative/action, not much depth but still very quick writing, knows how to entertain – very important for sitcoms I think.
Had funny points.


Total comments - 109

All in all, I'm happy with that. It was a twenty-minute script written on a very tight deadline, and the actors only had a few hours to practice reading the script. There was also no blocking done and the script was literally just read to the audience. Because of this, it was read perhaps a little quicker than it would have been if acted out, but it was enjoyable nonetheless. The director of the theatre turned to me, claimed it was genious, and said he'd pay to put the play on himself.

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